The Comedian

A couple of months ago, Phoebe and I started rehearsing an act for the CBC talent show. It was an old Sesame Street skit where Prairie Dawn (the little girl muppet) sings a song which describes words that begin with the letter Q while Grover (the perpetually befuddled blue monster muppet) makes silly, incorrect guesses, eventually exasperating Prairie Dawn.

Phoebe was just adorable during these practice sessions, the song was funny, and the whole thing seemed like it was going to be a slam dunk.

That is, until about two weeks ago, when Phoebe decided that she no longer wanted to sing the song, and no amount of coaxing was going to change her mind.

We still had a time slot reserved, so I started scrambling for a new idea. But Phoebe shot down every idea I came up with. Finally, with only a few days left until showtime, she agreed to tell some jokes.

So last weekend, I served as Phoebe’s straight man in a comedy routine which showcased gags like:

Patient: Doctor, doctor! My husband thinks he's a chicken!
Doctor: How long has this been going on?
Patient: For about five years.
Doctor: Five years? Why haven't you come to see me sooner?
Patient: Because we needed the eggs.

But the most inspired thing about the act was this: after each joke, Zach (sitting just offstage) played the vaudeville-like reaction noise on his trombone. WAAHHH-waahh!

Ben even got in on the action with a few gags of his own.

But Phoebe – well, she got such a great crowd reaction and so many compliments afterward that now, she has the comedy bug in a big way. She recites her jokes every chance she gets, and she’s already talking about what she wants to do at the next talent show. I think I can probably just forget about the cutesy little-girl stuff. We have a stand-up comedian on our hands.

Houserspawn(tm) in the News

Zach made an appearance in our local Town Talk newspaper last week for his role in a service project he participated in at school.

The text of the article reads as follows:

Three Amosland Elementary School students of Lauren Derby, Reading Specialist / LEP (Gifted Support) Teacher for Ridley School District, recently conceptualized and executed a community service project that helped students as Park Lane Elementary School in Darby. The trio conducted a drive that asked classmates, parents, and teachers to donate old, new, or gently used items such as; notebooks, art supplies, books, teaching materials, and even sporting goods to a school that had a wish list of needs. With the help of their clever marketing that included morning announcements and letters to both parents and teachers, they collected, sorted, packed and delivered over 30 boxes of goods to the classrooms at Park Lane. Above, l-r Zachary Houser, Gurleen Kaur, Varshini Malliredigari are pictured packing donations.

So You Think You Can Dance

Last month, Zach and Phoebe performed in a musical at church.

As you can see in this video, it's just a crying shame that Zach is so inhibited on stage. We have to find some way to get that boy to come out of his shell.

Everything You Always Wanted To Know About Polar Bears...

As part of the Learning Enrichment Program he is in at school, Zach was on public access cable TV tonight presenting a report he put together on polar bears.

I was hoping his presentation would more closely mirror Steve Carell's "Wildlife Expert" bit from his days as a correspondent on The Daily Show, but I thought it was pretty solid nonetheless.

The sound isn't very clear, so here's the transcript:

"My name is Zachary, I'm from Amosland, my project is on polar bears, my favorite fact I learned is that polar bears sometimes have snowball fights with each other and my favorite part of doing this project was doing the true or false test."