The Comedian

A couple of months ago, Phoebe and I started rehearsing an act for the CBC talent show. It was an old Sesame Street skit where Prairie Dawn (the little girl muppet) sings a song which describes words that begin with the letter Q while Grover (the perpetually befuddled blue monster muppet) makes silly, incorrect guesses, eventually exasperating Prairie Dawn.

Phoebe was just adorable during these practice sessions, the song was funny, and the whole thing seemed like it was going to be a slam dunk.

That is, until about two weeks ago, when Phoebe decided that she no longer wanted to sing the song, and no amount of coaxing was going to change her mind.

We still had a time slot reserved, so I started scrambling for a new idea. But Phoebe shot down every idea I came up with. Finally, with only a few days left until showtime, she agreed to tell some jokes.

So last weekend, I served as Phoebe’s straight man in a comedy routine which showcased gags like:

Patient: Doctor, doctor! My husband thinks he's a chicken!
Doctor: How long has this been going on?
Patient: For about five years.
Doctor: Five years? Why haven't you come to see me sooner?
Patient: Because we needed the eggs.

But the most inspired thing about the act was this: after each joke, Zach (sitting just offstage) played the vaudeville-like reaction noise on his trombone. WAAHHH-waahh!

Ben even got in on the action with a few gags of his own.

But Phoebe – well, she got such a great crowd reaction and so many compliments afterward that now, she has the comedy bug in a big way. She recites her jokes every chance she gets, and she’s already talking about what she wants to do at the next talent show. I think I can probably just forget about the cutesy little-girl stuff. We have a stand-up comedian on our hands.

We Wish You A Merry Fitness

Over the Christmas and New Years holidays, we had the opportunity to make several trips to visit Linda's parents.

Nana and Grandpa have a big yard where the kids can run and play, a dog that loves attention, and a large assortment of toys and games. And during our visits, the kids were the recipients of many generous gifts from their grandparents, aunts, and uncles.

And yet, the kids' favorite activity at Nana and Grandpa's house is to play on the old stationary bike and treadmill that Linda's parents keep in the basement.

The most popular games include:

- running the treadmill at full speed and dodging the toys that your siblings place on the track
- using the treadmill guardrails to flip upside-down (preferably, with the treadmill still running)
- climbing between the treadmill and stationary bike without touching the floor

Because after all, when you're a child, what is more compelling than wanton danger and recklessness?

(Answer: Nothing.)

Basketball Season Begins

Basketball season is now in full swing for Team Houserspawn(tm). After three weeks of clinics and scrimages, teams have been chosen, and official games begin on Saturday.

We opted to keep Phoebe back with the younger kids so that she and Ben could be on a team together, while Zach chose to move up and play with the 8 and 9 year olds. It'll be a challenge for him, as he's one of the youngest kids in his league, but so far, he has held his own.

The Adventures of Adventure Girl

Out of our three kids, Phoebe is easily the most fearless when it comes to amusement rides, as demonstrated by her willingness to ride anything during our amusement park visits this summer, including last week's visits to Dutch Wonderland and Knoebels Grove.

Roller coasters? Check. Log flumes? Check. Waterslides that expel the rider 10 feet over the deep end of the swimming pool? Check.

Unfortunately, at 47" tall, Phoebe just misses out on the 48" minimum height for some of the more ambitious rides.

Just wait 'til next year...